FLASH FICTION:-- HORROR, SCI-FI, HUMOUR, CRIME, SLICE OF LIFE, ETC.

Friday 8 August 2014

A stillness in the air (Part 1)


There was not a whisper of a breeze. Not a rustle of leaf or twitch of grass.

It felt like the world held its breath.

Possibly the last breath it would ever hold.

Blake scanned the valley and the distant low hills, flicking through the spectrums with each pass of the scope. Nothing.

If there was life out there the scope would have found it.

Nothing. Not an insect, a bird, a rabbit.

They knew. They all knew something was coming.

Blake slid the scope into its sheath. He glanced back over his shoulder at the squat slab of the citadel in the centre of the plain several miles away.

Even from this distance the massive walls looked impregnable, unbreachable. Bristling with weaponry. The huge, multi-barrelled Spitlight cannons could take out anything known to mankind.

But it wasn't men that were coming for them.

Of one hundred and sixteen citadels scattered throughout the planet, this was the only one left.

One by one they had all been crushed.

Blake checked his weapon one more time. A miniature, hand held version of the massive Spitlights. A devastating weapon, proven in many campaigns, but it brought him little comfort now. At least wielding it meant he would die a soldier's death.

He sat down on the grass and breathed deeply, forcing himself to relax.

The stillness in the air felt unnatural. It had the aura of an animal frozen in fear.

Even so, Blake took what he could from the peace and quiet.

A slight tremor ran through the ground, barely detectable. The air began to thrum.

Blake flicked his commset. “Base, this is Scout Delta niner, they're coming.”

His earpiece crackled. “Roger Delta niner. Hold position, let them pass, then engage at your discretion... And may god be with you.”

A rapid staccato stabbed the quiet as the men all up and down the line locked and loaded.

A slight shimmer briefly distorted the ridge as Invisuits were switched to full camo mode.

Blake reached into an inner breast pocket and pulled out the picture of Sulya and the girls. He looked at it for several seconds, feeling the emotion building in him. He kissed the photo then replaced in his pocket, the one next to his heart, storing the love there alongside it. He wiped the single tear from his cheek as he switched on his own camo.

Blake gazed at the horizon, a faint pink glow appeared, slowly darkening toward red.

The storm was a long way off yet.

But it was coming fast.

Bringing them with it.


©2014 Stephen. J. Green.

Continued in:- A stillness in the air (Part 2)

22 comments:

  1. Who?! You can't stop there! I have to know who them are! These two sentence really set the scene "It felt like the world held its breath. Possibly the last breath it would ever hold." The story held me from beginning to end. I think you could turn this into something much bigger ^_^

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    1. I have left it a bit like a partly-decorated room, haven't I? LOL
      This is yet another flash that I wrote as a stand-alone piece, but looks like it needs finishing off. I'll let it simmer for a day or two and see what I can come up with. :-)

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  2. this is so weird, I'm currently writing a flash about a rifle sight for next week's flash. I enjoyed this one Steve

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    1. Hi Marc, I can well believe that a rifle sight has seen many remarkable things in its life, I'll look forward to reading about them. :-)

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  3. You can't leave it there! I need to know what's coming!

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    1. Sorry to leave you hanging, but I'm working on it Icy. :-)

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  4. It felt like the world held its breath.

    Possibly the last breath it would ever hold. THE MOST AWESOME WORDS EVER

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    1. Thank you very much Nadine. "Awesome" is a helluva compliment. :-)

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  5. This is fantastic Steve, and I too was held, enthralled, from beginning to what I hope is only the end of the first scene....(not-so-big-hint).

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    1. Thank you Roslyn. I'm going to work on a follow-on for it. If I can get my muse fully on the case it's possible it may turn into a serial, I'm not sure which way it will go yet though. :-)

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    1. Hiya Sonia, I'm afraid I haven't worked that one out myself yet. :-)

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  7. The tension in this is tight, Steve. And the emotional pull—the sense that this is it, mankind's final stand—is totally gripping. Well done, my friend. Like the others, I want to see what's coming. Whatever it is though, you've set the stage well enough that the reader wants to see, but may be too scared to see at the same time.

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    1. Thanks Stephen, the feedback for this short piece has been very heartening. I am going to work on adding to it, but I'm not sure yet where to take it, or indeed how many more installments there may be. :-)

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  8. +1 for continuing with this! I liked the world details -- names like Spitlight are strongly science fiction, but hark back to earlier wars. I hope there's more next week.

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    1. Thanks Katherine. I wrote a part 2 for this yesterday, so it will be at least a two-part mini series, I'm not sure yet whether to take it further than that though.

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  9. I watch in anticipation of the zombie apocalypse. They are coming...

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    1. Sorry if it disappoints, Jon - but what is on the way is most definitely not zombies. :-)

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  10. I held my breath! I think I set a record! Oh I got excited, so excited as that tremor ran through the ground and now just like Blake and the other soldiers I am anticipating what's coming. But, what's coming?

    I don't know why but I was reminded of The Langoliers, which is always nice I guess. Jumping on to part 2!

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    1. Hiya Cindy, it hit the spot, then? LOL

      My intention was to create the feeling of something big and very dangerous on the way, but an unknown something, as none of the other citadels had survived to pass on any information. Also the rather certain knowledge that, although they would fight, none of them really expected to survive the day either.

      I didn't intend to write a part two when I penned this, and added it later, I hope the direction I took it in doesn't disappoint.

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