Friday, 3 December 2010


I stared through the windscreen, my heart was beating fast, too fast, an irregular tattoo of bumps and thuds pounding against my ribcage. Almost deafened by the gushing, sporadic pulse in my ears.

I held the steering wheel in a death grip, hands twitching and shaking, arms rigid, muscles solid.

I felt the sweat begin to trickle through my hair, dampening my scalp, soaking it through, plastering my hair to my head, weaving its way down my already clammy forehead, dripping from my eyebrows and nose.
It cascaded from the back of my head, running down the nape of my neck, soaking my collar.
My shirt drenched wet at armpits, back, and chest.
It streamed down my spine, puddling on the car seat, and trickling to the floor.

My mouth was dry, arid, my tongue a lifeless leathery slug stuck to the roof of my mouth, my throat constantly dry-swallowing, adam's apple yoyoing rapidly.

Cold, steely, writhing worms of tension iced their way through my guts, my scrotum pulled tight against my body.
My sphincter constantly contracting and relaxing, bowels threatening to empty as the fear washed over me in continuous tidal waves.

A glance in the mirror showed a face haggard with terror, apprehensive, drawn, pale, lined with tension, the mouth tight, and thin-lipped, eyes impossibly wide open, round and staring, each one a bullseye of white, blue, and black.

Then the visions came...

And the sounds...

I watched in horror as the cars collided…

Racing engines...

Squealing tyres...

Shrieking brakes...

Screaming voices....

A never-ending continuous cacophony...

A horrifying montage of colour and movement.

I watched as the cars piled into one another, impacted, compacted, flipped over, somersaulted...

Bones cracked and splintered against steering columns, faces punched through windscreens, flesh and sinew shredded against glass and steel, limbs torn from torsos....

On and on, until all I saw stretching from horizon to horizon was a rolling boiling ocean of tortured twisted mangled metal and Minced meat.
Intertwined, interlocked.
Bent bumpers, gnarled grills, crumpled bonnets and doors.
Shattered windows, light glinting off the odd diamond of glass still stubbornly clinging to the rubber seal.

A viscous globby cocktail of coolant, brake fluid, fuel, and gore splattered over it all.

The voice brought me back to reality...

“Don't worry.” Said the instructor. “ It's quite normal to be a bit nervous on your first driving lesson.”

©2010 Stephen. J. Green.


  1. Wow this is so powerful I realised at the end that my face had scrunched up as I read it. Your descriptions of terror are absolutely fantastic.

    Thank goodness for that twist at the end. I heaved such a sigh of relief!

    Love it.

  2. Ha! you had me fooled there! Loved the gore :D

  3. Thanks. I needed a good laugh today.

  4. Was not expecting a laugh to follow, "A viscous globby cocktail of coolant, brake fluid, fuel, and gore splattered over it all."

    Now that was a wild ride! :)

  5. Hi guys, thanks for reading.

    Rebecca,thank you, this is yet another of my older works, (they have nearly all been published now, then I can get back to writing the short nasty stuff :-D ) I wasn't sure whether to put it under the horror, or humour genre.

    Hiya Maria, It's lovely to see you back amongst the #Fridayflashers, it's not called "The Twisted Quill" for nothing. ( I don't know if anyone has noticed, but I changed the name slightly, it was my original intention for the blog name, and I was never really happy with "Steve's Twisted Quill."

    Rol, thank you, I am really glad if it brightened up your day a little, if I aim for humour, either dark or light, and it works, then it makes this a little bit more worthwhile.

    Harry, hold on tight, yeeeehaaaah!!! :-D

  6. Love the twist at the end...I remember my first driving lesson. I'm sure my instructor does too. Sorry I've been away. I had computer problems and the flu.

  7. Hi Rachel, thanks for reading, I hope you are feeling better, two sodding viruses at the same time? oh bugger.

  8. I had visions before my first driving lesson that I'd get in a burning wreck. Took weeks of practice for them to go away. Never even got a ticket. Some of us are such melodramatic drivers.

  9. I think my first drive gave my dad a vision or two. Good story. And what wonderful descriptions.

  10. Hi guys, thanks for reading.

    John, I think the fear of crashing is what makes safe drivers, it's the ones who don't see the dangers that usually end up in trouble.

    Stephen, your dad must have been very brave to be in the car with you on your first drive, I don't think my nerves would be able to stand it teaching someone else.

  11. Really had me fooled there. Good twist.

  12. Trevor, thank you for reading and commenting, I'm glad that you liked it.

  13. I could totally feel his terror. The end made me giggle with relief. You really know how to make your reader flinch! Well done. :)

  14. Hi Steve - loved your twist; didn't see that coming. Should also get a prize for the most evocative description of sweat I've read so far. I thought he was going to have to start bailing... Nicely done.

  15. Steve, this is absolutely stunning! Fantastic descriptions, and oh, what a twist. Glad I was left laughing.

  16. Hi Steve, you are great at pulling the reader into an intense scene. Just great I tell you! Loved it!

  17. I would rather learn to drive in real life instead of VR. Don't feel a need to learn through actual experience about some things. You paint a gruesome picture; made me think about the hundred car pileups that sometimes happen in the winter.

  18. Hi guys, thank you all for reading and commenting.

    Gracie, It actually started out as horror, but I thought "what the hell" go for the humour as well.

    Stephen, yeah, the sweat bit was meant to be over the top, a bit like one of the scenes from a spoof movie.

    Deanna, Thank you, I am so glad it lightened your day :-D

    Tiffany, you are very kind, thank you.

    Aidan, that is the kind of image I was seeing, only covering much more distance.

  19. Excellent job writing what phobic fear feels like. I was envisioning the automobile apocalypse before the twist ending. Gave me a giggle too.

  20. Thanks Gen, I'm glad that I decided to add the humourous ending, it seems to have been taken quite well. :-D

  21. Very nice twist, had me laughing out loud. The kid must think he's a really bad driver if he's going to bring about Carmaggedon.

    Sometimes feels like there are a few too many alliterations and adjectives, but that might be me.

    Should have stopped by sooner and sorry I haven't.

  22. Hi James, thanks for reading, I'm glad that it gave you a chuckle, you may be right about the alliteration and adjectives, I was aiming for "over the top" and so I tried to drive the point home.

  23. Good one! Such great descriptions throughout, and then the ending brought out a laugh from me. Excellent!

  24. Thanks Eric, it seems to have tickled quite a few people. :-D

  25. Ha! That was freakin' awesome. I probably should have seen the end coming, but I didn't. Great job!

  26. Hi Catherine, yes I think by now readers of my #Fridayflashes are getting to expect something other than the obvious at the end. Thank you for the very kind comment.

  27. It's amazing how you can blow something completely out of proportion, isn't it?

    Excellent ending.

  28. Thank you Icy, I think the guy may have more problems once the car actually starts moving. :-D