Friday, 27 March 2015
As it fell
Oh, how we loved.
Hard and fast.
In any place or where.
In any when.
And as we loved, the world fell.
But not for us.
It wouldn't dare.
Our love was feverish.
Unlike the virus.
Cold and creeping.
It took most everything.
From most everyone.
A world left weeping.
Our only tears were ecstatic.
Post orgasmic crying.
The world was dying.
But still we loved.
With maniacal fury.
As was right.
As was our right.
To be.
As we wanted to be.
As it fell.
©2015 Stephen. J. Green.
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I read this twice, and I really really liked it. Such a mixture of emotions when the world crumbles around you.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Helen. Poetry is not my usual thing, but this one just happened. It rhymes in odd places, but I wrote it straight off the top of my head, editing only one line, so it must have in there just waiting to burst out. :-)
DeleteGoing out with a bang, as it were. :-D
ReplyDeleteThis was good -- it captured well the emotions of the frantic lovers at The End.
Larry, your reply made me LOL for real!
DeleteHaha!! I guess that would be one way of putting it Larry. :-)
DeleteOr maybe we could say they were riding out the apocalypse. (Chuckle)
What an AWESOME poem. Great work!
ReplyDeleteThank you,Catherine. Awesome is high praise indeed. It always comes as a great confidence boost when posts are received in this way. :-)
Deletelove and desperation make powerful stories and poems, just like yours. Nicely done!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Claudia. Love and desperation do indeed make for powerful literature.
DeleteThank you for the very kind words. :-)
Well, now I know how I want the world to end! ;-) Nice work.
ReplyDeleteThanks Tim. Should the day arrive, and we are given options, I think this one would probably have little competition. :-)
DeleteThe first thing that popped into my head after reading the last line was Bowie's Heros. Very cool effect with the short line lengths.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Katherine.
DeleteI hope for our protags' sakes that it lasts longer than 'Just for one day' though. :-)
Powerful stuff. If it has to end, better to end like this than with a whimper. Affirmation of life in the midst of death.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Li.
DeleteAt least they wouldn't be just sat around wringing their hands and moping about it, would they? :-)
This is really seizing the day. Very powerful.
ReplyDeleteHi Denise, thank you for stopping by, and for the very kind words. It's good to hear from you. :-)
DeleteReally enjoyed this. Made me think of people's passion for their lives in general, regardless of what happens in the world around us.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Richard. Passion is much better than despair, isn't it?
DeleteWow. This was excellent, Steve. The pace of the lines heightened the sense of urgency of the impending virus and made the love story even more enjoyable. I'm running late catching up on my reading and I'm glad I didn't miss this one.
ReplyDeleteHiya Chuck, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for stopping by, and for the great feedback, it is very much appreciated. :-)
DeleteNice step into poetry. Nice to exercise other skills at times.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jon. I didn't deliberately set out to write a poem though, it just kind of happened.
DeleteI usually don't set out to write poetry either. Sometimes the story just does what it wants to do.
DeleteExcellent work, Steve!
ReplyDeleteThanks Icy, glad you enjoyed it. :-)
DeleteThis is simply beautiful.
ReplyDeleteHi Cindy it's good to hear from you, I hope all is good with you. :-)
DeleteThank you for the kind words, poetry is not my usual thing but the responses to this post have been very heartening.
Steve,
ReplyDeleteIt's been a long time. I hope all is well with you! I was thinking the other day about your stories and wondered how you have been doing, whether you've been writing more. I'd love to hear from you!
Best wishes,
Cindy
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteHi Steve! Absolutely thrilled that you wrote back! I'll email you as soon as possible!
ReplyDeleteBest wishes and safe travels!
Cindy
Hi again Cindy, I have removed my email from the blog now, and we will talk again soon. My wife and I are setting off to visit relatives on the Norfolk Broads, (they live on a boat) We will be back some time on Tuesday, and I look forward to talking with you soon after.
DeleteMy very best wishes.
Steve.