tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post1772278871145246664..comments2023-04-07T13:32:15.954+01:00Comments on The Twisted Quill: 47 DaysSteve Greenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18414279461366098783noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-83147547863556524042011-08-30T21:30:48.376+01:002011-08-30T21:30:48.376+01:00@Harry - Hiya Harry, I think you may have just hit...@Harry - Hiya Harry, I think you may have just hit on the reason why the UK is always ten years behind the USA. :-)<br /><br />@Liminal - Thank you, the repetition just seemed to be the right thing to do with this one.Steve Greenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18414279461366098783noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-14090918000384343422011-08-30T19:42:07.698+01:002011-08-30T19:42:07.698+01:00I enjoyed this, thanks Steve. I like the way you ...I enjoyed this, thanks Steve. I like the way you use repetition in your stories, it's effective and engaging.liminalfictionhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08762010680878316253noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-33632470460065975552011-08-29T19:46:26.857+01:002011-08-29T19:46:26.857+01:00I caught the elephants as being a way of spacing t...I caught the elephants as being a way of spacing the seconds, though here it is more common to say one Missisippi, two Missisippi....and the 3 vs. 4 syllables made me wonder if your clocks aren't a bit fast there. I've always wondered when you hear stories about people moving towards a light or some such, and feeling a sense of peace, if they aren't dissappointed to be turned back. Not anxious to find out for myself. <br /><br />Nice work Steve!Harryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09628269009060185397noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-23395451159479906042011-08-29T10:51:48.126+01:002011-08-29T10:51:48.126+01:00Hi everyone, and thank you all for the very kind f...Hi everyone, and thank you all for the very kind feedback. When I posted this I did wonder if readers would understand the significance of the elephants as a way of spacing the seconds, but everyone seemed to either know it, or work it out okay.Steve Greenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18414279461366098783noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-52129515558823341392011-08-28T15:09:20.873+01:002011-08-28T15:09:20.873+01:00Nice pacing. I wasn't totally surprised by the...Nice pacing. I wasn't totally surprised by the ending, but the buildup and tension was very well done. Great job!Cat Russellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14160039271069426174noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-46293605645079486562011-08-28T11:27:54.678+01:002011-08-28T11:27:54.678+01:00Good job he didn't need to walk back exactly t...Good job he didn't need to walk back exactly the way he'd come but I can't help wondering what would have happened if he'd just kept going. Would that corridor ever lead anywhere?Icy Sedgwickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11501193571425442406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-73984030792540259952011-08-28T10:39:20.974+01:002011-08-28T10:39:20.974+01:00Hi there Steve -- I like this. Nicely moderate, do...Hi there Steve -- I like this. Nicely moderate, doesn't go crazy. It's got a clean, hospital quality to that white light some folk talk about. Liked the door being just behind him after the long walk, and his elephant counting. St.Stephenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10111660663883108862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-89831700587603611142011-08-28T03:06:35.276+01:002011-08-28T03:06:35.276+01:00Nice! When he saw the sign that said "Go Back...Nice! When he saw the sign that said "Go Back" I was thinking, "Don't do it. Keep going." I love the concept with this story.Chuck Allenhttp://www.chuckallen.usnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-91004316700775106942011-08-27T14:14:33.627+01:002011-08-27T14:14:33.627+01:00Like Tim, I zeroed in on the Just-Keep-Walking lin...Like Tim, I zeroed in on the Just-Keep-Walking lines. There are times when that is all you can do. The ending was great, and the mental sign to go back was a nice touch.Stephenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04753736809917062955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-8531858005658655242011-08-27T10:09:15.739+01:002011-08-27T10:09:15.739+01:00Loved your pacing (sorry!) in this story and the r...Loved your pacing (sorry!) in this story and the repetition throughout works well. I like the fact that the mc is totally unphased by their situation.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-83833176343012273832011-08-27T05:11:41.908+01:002011-08-27T05:11:41.908+01:00The signpost of Go Back! was very nice. My first t...The signpost of Go Back! was very nice. My first thought was that the door was sneaking up on him, but I like the idea that he was wandering in a coma.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14170148559429001125noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-2713501981009200912011-08-26T20:58:08.982+01:002011-08-26T20:58:08.982+01:00I had no idea what was happening to him, I thought...I had no idea what was happening to him, I thought he might actually be dead. Nice ending, and the slow pace was perfect for this story. I got a chuckle out the idea of him counting the seconds all that time.Larry Kollarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08317037795075278427noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-87882805489358140832011-08-26T20:49:22.003+01:002011-08-26T20:49:22.003+01:00"Just keep walking" is pretty good advic..."Just keep walking" is pretty good advice even when not in a coma. I like the feel of this.Tim VanSant Writeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17614259042362664840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-31256173123074712902011-08-26T09:25:14.950+01:002011-08-26T09:25:14.950+01:00What they said. Really tight and claustrophobic so...What they said. Really tight and claustrophobic so the positive nature of the pay-off was something of a release.Jason Cogginshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09509338964933754054noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-2379366478328177112011-08-26T09:22:30.192+01:002011-08-26T09:22:30.192+01:00Feels half-lucid and very loopy in neat ways. Spen...Feels half-lucid and very loopy in neat ways. Spend a bit of it trying to figure out just what the elephants are really signifying.John Wiswellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07416044628686736927noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-24460129471553159062011-08-26T09:01:15.826+01:002011-08-26T09:01:15.826+01:00A moving and tightly written piece, Steve. Well do...A moving and tightly written piece, Steve. Well done.Rolhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02103804480646939038noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-91639582469906678402011-08-26T05:23:39.970+01:002011-08-26T05:23:39.970+01:00Excellent story! Stories about what happen to us a...Excellent story! Stories about what happen to us at death always peak my interest, and yours was quite well done.Eric J. Krausehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05774468607814244185noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-79907814457362462722011-08-26T02:33:24.151+01:002011-08-26T02:33:24.151+01:00Good story! Figured it would be a near-death hospi...Good story! Figured it would be a near-death hospital thing (kind of. wasn't totally sure until the end), but I liked the way you did it.Sonia Lalhttp://storytreasury.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947555836132631506.post-47142159402880074792011-08-26T02:05:48.358+01:002011-08-26T02:05:48.358+01:00I was engrossed on following his steps, wondering ...I was engrossed on following his steps, wondering where it would lead. Then that signpost appeared and said Go Back! I sorta guessed at that point he was in hospital but wasn't sure. Pleased to find out I was right.<br /><br />Good story kept me reading and wondering!Helenhttp://helen-scribbles.comnoreply@blogger.com